I am constantly creating my own suffering.  

Deep down I feel another way.  I see how I get in my way when I go in another’s lane. I get distracted by looking outside of myself. It’s how I learned to survive but I wish to thrive.  

I reach and reach for ideas on how to be. I forget that I know who I am.  All the noise in this life is loud but I know how to get quiet. The silence isn’t scary.  

In solitude I remember.  I see she is so good. She has made excuses to hide. She thought if it all looked good than she would feel good inside.

She keeps it all together but feels like she could fall apart. She taught herself to sew the cracks shut. In the silence though she allows herself to open.  She sees that the light of day puts warmth on the cracks.  

She isn’t broken. Life had given her so much love. She decided to focus on this.  This direction of thought attracted more love.  

There is a well deep inside her that is a never ending supply of good. She remembers she can reach there instead of outside herself.  She knows that getting in her own way is innocent.  Her creating her own suffering has been a way back to herself.  She allows what could be as her new way.

She trusts herself.